Jill Sullivan - May 3, 2012

Jill Sullivan was our guest speaker this year for our Fabulous Fashion Fiesta.  We want to share her message with everyone.

Since tonight is all about fashion, let’s review a few of the fashion trends of the recent decades.  We’ll start in the 60’s, since that’s when I arrived. 

I was born right in the middle of the sixties, so fortunately I was pretty much oblivious to the styles of that day.  This was the decade of bell bottoms, mini-skirts, white go-go boots, and peace signs.  Long straight hair parted down the middle was in style, but so was the beehive.  Fashion icons included Jackie Kennedy, the Beatles, and Cher. 

I started kindergarten at the beginning of the seventies, and graduated from junior high by the end of it.  The seventies brought us platform shoes, wide-legged jeans, and hot pants.  The disco look was all the rage.  Think John Travolta and Farrah Fawcett.  I mean, who didn’t want to be Farrah Fawcett … or at least have her hair?  How many of us spent hours in front of the mirror trying to get our hair feathered just right…?

I was in high school and college in the 1980’s … the days of ripped sweatshirts, leg warmers, and massive shoulder pads.  After all, everyone knows that the bigger your shoulders are, the smaller your waist looks, right?  And our hair … well, the bigger, the better!  Our fashion icons were Brooke Shields, Christie Brinkley, and Madonna.

By the time the ‘90’s rolled around, I was a young mom, and fashion had taken a back seat in my life.  And it’s just as well, because that was the decade of designer tennis shoes, bare midriffs, baggy pants and slap bracelets.  By this time, everyone wanted Jennifer Aniston’s or Meg Ryan’s hair.

And now we’re in the 2000’s  … in which both flare jeans and skinny jeans are equally acceptable.  Ugg boots, Crocs and designer flip flops are all the rage.  And then there’s the fashion trend that no one understands … pants that sag so low they show your underwear.  Seriously, does anyone understand that one?  Reese Witherspoon and Angelina Jolie would be two of our best-known fashion icons from this millennium.

So, as we can see…fashion trends come and go.  Things that were once considered cool and fashionable are nothing but a joke today.  How could we possibly have thought that wearing shoulder pads big enough to play football in was a good thing?

Should we, as Christian girls and women, even care about fashion?  Should we even try to keep up with the latest styles and trends when they change all the time?  Sure…. Of course we want to take care of ourselves and seek to be appealing and attractive to the culture around us.  But should this be our primary focus?

I Peter 3:3-4 tells us, “Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.”

Did you catch that?   It is the inner adorning that God puts the most emphasis on.  “Let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.”

Who here wouldn’t like to have “imperishable beauty?”  We all know that as we age, our outward beauty has a way of fading.  But isn’t it exciting to think that we can all have a beauty that will not fade with age or illness?

Where does this verse in I Peter say that this imperishable beauty comes from?  From a gentle and quiet spirit.  So what exactly is a gentle and quiet spirit?

Characteristics of a gentle and quiet spirit….

1.      A gentle and quiet spirit is NOT weak.  “Gentle” can also be translated as meek, and actually appears that way in many translations.  “Meek” is not really a word that we women like very much.  I mean, who wants to be “meek”?  Isn’t that just another word for “doormat?”  The words “gentle” or “meek” actually mean patient, kind, longsuffering, not easily irritated or annoyed.   I don’t know about you, but I think it takes a lot of strength to not be easily irritated or annoyed.  In fact, I believe a woman with a gentle and quiet spirit is a natural leader…she has a humble confidence, and is able to demonstrate leadership without being overly controlling or domineering.  And her desire to lead is rooted in an earnest desire to please God, not to be the center of attention or to get glory for herself.
2.     A gentle and quiet spirit does NOT mean we never talk or that we only talk quietly.  Some of us are naturally more outgoing and some may even tend to have a little more volume about us than others.   Note that it doesn’t say a “gentle and quiet personality” or a “gentle and quiet voice.”  It’s a “gentle and quiet SPRIT” that is precious in God’s sight.  I do believe that while a woman with a gentle and quiet spirit is slow to speak, when she does speak, people have a tendency to listen, because she is able to communicate spiritual truth with wisdom.  And when she speaks, it is not in an effort to gain attention for herself, but from a desire to bring glory to God.
3.     A woman with a gentle and quiet spirit is at peace with herself and those around her.  She gets along with everyone, because, like I said earlier, she is not easily offended or irritated.  Sure, people still say things that hurt her feelings or cause her to get upset from time to time, but she freely extends grace to them, fully aware that she is just as capable of inflicting hurt on others.  Not only is she at peace with the people around her, she is at peace with her circumstances.  She is content with her position in life, with her possessions, and with her place as a child of God.  Fear has no place in her life, because her trust in God is complete. 

 Sounds like the perfect woman, doesn’t she?  Obviously, we can never obtain perfection this side of Heaven, but I do believe, as Christians, that we should strive to be as Christ-like as we can be.  So how do we become women with gentle and quiet spirits?  Just a couple of thoughts to share with you…

1.      Slow down!  I’m talking to myself here!  The pace of our lives today is just incredible.  It seems that we rush from one activity to the next, with hardly time for a breath in between.  Many of our activities are good things, but we find ourselves so rushed trying to get everything done, that we don’t have time to do anything well.  I ran across this quote the other day, and it is so true… “On every level of life, from housework to heights of prayer, in all judgment and efforts to get things done, hurry and impatience are sure marks of the amateur.” ― Evelyn Underhill       I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to be an amateur.  How often do we just worry about getting on with the next thing without fully entering the thing in front of us?  If we are in Christ, our time is not running out … we are actually already living in eternity, if you think about it.  Let’s make a choice, a conscious decision, to live life fully aware of His grace and goodness to us.  John Piper tells us that we must tune our senses to SEE His grace.  And in order to do that well, we must slow down!   And just a word to the young moms here … it seems that when our children are babies, we spend all our time pushing them to grow up … we can’t wait for them to sit up, to crawl, to walk.  And then, when they do grow up, we spend all our time lamenting the fact that they are growing up. Crying when they start kindergarten, go to junior high, or graduate from high school.  Don’t do that!  Make a decision to enjoy every minute of their growing up time.

2.     We need to live in an attitude of thanksgiving.  And we can only be truly thankful when we slow down enough to really see the world and the people around us.  Often, our problem is not lack of time…it’s a lack of thanksgiving.  John tells us that Jesus gave thanks just before raising Lazarus from the dead.  In Matthew, we read that Jesus gave thanks for the five loaves and two fish before miraculously feeding a multitude of people with them.  And on the night before Jesus was crucified, Luke tells us that “He took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them… (Luke 22:19).  Jesus took time to thank His Father … and in every case, his prayer of gratitude was followed by a miracle.  Try it yourself sometime and see if it doesn’t make a difference in your life… When you’re holding that colicky baby in the middle of the night (for the sixth night in a row), take a moment and thank God for how good it feels to nuzzle that soft little neck.  Or when you’re folding that endless mound of laundry, thank Him for how good it feels to put on a clean pair of socks on a cold winter’s day.  When we take time to fully appreciate the things God gives us, our attitude can be completely renewed.  And what greater way is there to please the Giver than to delight in His gifts?

You know, I will never have Angelina Jolie’s figure, Farrah Fawcett’s hair, or Jackie Kennedy’s sense of style.  And that’s okay. 

Because remember what the I Peter tells us…“Let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.”   Fashion trends and fads may come and go, but the beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit is imperishable.  It’s fine to have fun with fashion and I do believe we should try to look our best outwardly … but let’s really focus our efforts on cultivating the beauty of that hidden person of our hearts.